i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
