you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
