I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Who wears a wallet chain?!
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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