I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
