OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
