I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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