.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
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