Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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