Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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