am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
