Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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