So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize