I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
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