If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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