i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize