Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
