The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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