If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
