fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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