It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize