I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
