i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
