Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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