After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
