I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
