the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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