This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
