I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
