that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
