You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
