The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
as a side note pls kill me
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