Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
