dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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