If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
