Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
A+ Viking dick
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
