I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he fucked my hip out of place.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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