definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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