the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
