Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
