one two three fourrrrnication!
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
