I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
