The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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