Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize