i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
