apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Randomize
