It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It was a blind-side dick pic.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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