She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
