well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Alive.
So much puke
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
