i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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