What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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